Hi HN!

The actual length and girth of famous people's erect penises isn't something we encounter very often in daily life.

This leads me to posit that there exists a hypothetical, imaginary set of measurements for all penis-owners in our collective imagination - measurements that bear no relation to reality.

Some use terms like 'Big Dick Energy' to express the hypothetical dimensionality of all these Schrödinger's Cocks that fill (or do not fill) our universe.

While these attempts to speculate about things that are none of our business are noble, they're ultimately vague, abstract, and ungrounded.

This presents a genuine problem: as a society, we are doing something funny (imagining penises) but not grounding that in real, earned, democratic consensus.

I introduce to you the solution: Penis Guesser - an attempt to obtain the collective imaginary consensus on the imaginary dimensions of famous people's penises.

How it works:

Users are presented with a series of penis owners and asked to guess each penis's length and width.

After guessing, users see the current average length and girth consensus.

After 10 guesses, users can access the leaderboard, sorted by length.

No actual penises are visible at any point - they remain entirely imaginary.

Some notes:

1 - This is a joke - definitely in bad taste, possibly funny, maybe illegal? YMMV! :-)

1.5 - The internet definitely used to be funnier! That was the inspiration - websites that were really stupid, like this. I admire when people put lots of effort into utterly pointless things.

2 - I've never made a website before; this is 'vibe-coded'. It's fun! I enjoyed making it. It's cool that a totally non-technical person can do this in an evening now. My job is writing books, not making websites, and I'm excited to find out all the mistakes I've made.

3 - I have bought penis-guesser.com but it seems like the internet takes a couple of days to understand that.

4 - As a non-coder, I love HN! I learn so much cool stuff on it. Thank you for it :-)

Show HN: P*Nis Guesser – Obtaining BDE Consensus